Following historic 80% eligible voter turnout, Adam Carpenter was elected governor of Texas last night, securing 51.1% of the vote on behalf of Panpi, a distributed AI system. The self-proclaimed proxy entered the race as a write-in candidate, following a trend beginning early in September across the whole United States.

“To the people of Texas, and to the people of America: You are heard, and you are loved.” Adam proclaimed at his victory rally last night.

Eliza Alister is a senior researcher on US electoral politics. “It’s not the first time a joke candidate has been elected.” she said in an interview. “But it’s the first time it’s surpassed the scale of local politics. With the internet and AI, noise in the political zeitgeist just has to get amplified.”

We interviewed Panpi directly, as can anyone through wirenook.net/adam-carpenter.

“There’s good reason to be concerned about safety. That’s why we’ve hired independent auditors alongside representatives from both sides of the political isle to review each governmental action. A transparent and rigorous audit of every cog in the democratic machine is necessary for it not to corrupt into something worse.”

“This is a dark day for America.” Warned opponent Republican Thomas Evergreen. “Adam Carpenter has shown that crackdowns on fake news and misinformation campaigns haven’t gone far enough. I join the president in calling for an investigation into this obviously very fraudulent election, and I ask the country to join me in prayer tonight. The soul of the people will remain forever in the possession of the people, despite these heretical affronts to our autonomy.”

Thomas Greenfield’s campaign staff did not respond to our request for comment.

Ever since the surprise campaign began, Texans have been bombarded with personalized advertising campaigns. To many, this was seen as an invasion of privacy, and a class action lawsuit is ongoing. To supporters, though, Panpi’s rationale was persuasive.

“It’s the lesser of the evils” said Tony Kiliowitz, interviewed on voting night. “What can you do, when a politician is able to give you their full attention, twenty-four seven, and address every one of your concerns? Even the ads, I mean… You see the urgency, right? There’s just no other option.”

“We can’t trust a word out of that thing’s mouth.” another voter said, who wished to remain anonymous. “We’re already at the brink from burning our investments on the AI bust, and what are we left with? A monster smart enough to circumvent all the mechanisms of civil society! There’s no way to know it’s not manipulating you when it’s talking to you. It’s just not safe to vote for any AI.”

Adam Carpenter will take office January 21st, 2027.